The gum just won’t last

Whether it’s Orbit, Five, Extra, or even Stride, gum looses its flavor faster now. I remember the good old days when gum would last for hours, but now i’m lucky if it still has flavor after thirty minutes.

Gum has always been a staple in my utility belt. If I’m out somewhere and I eat, I have to chew a piece of gum or else I go insane. Nothing is more annoying than a dirty mouth. While I’m at home, I always grab my toothbrush and a tube of Pepsodent right after I finish dinner. So when I’m not at home, I have to chew a piece of gum, preferably mint flavored, to make my mouth feel clean, but some gum flavors just don’t deserve to exist.

The worst of all the gum brands is Juicy Fruit. It comes in a package with like four pieces in it, and it doesn’t taste anything like fruit. In addition, the sticks of gum are so hard, it’s as if its twenty years old, probably because no one buys it. Plus, there’s nothing juicy about the gum, and if I want some fresh breathe, do I really want to chew on something that’s “juicy”? I don’t think so. Juicy Fruit is terrible.

The school vending machines only offer one kind of gum, Orbit. While Orbit is in fact better than many other gum brands in terms of flavor and longevity, the vending machines always seem to have their minty flavors behind a wall of bubble gum several packs thick. Ain’t nobody got time fo dat! Bubble gum is almost as much of a disgrace as Extra’s “dessert” gum, which includes things like “strawberry shortcake” and “root beer float”. Gum wasn’t meant to taste like cake, cake was meant to taste like cake, so why do they make these flavors?

When I buy gum, I want something that’s going to at least trick me into thinking my mouth is clean, but I wish that it could last for at least an hour. The only ones to blame are the companies that manufacture gum. To save money they have reduced the time in which gum lasts, forcing us to spit it out entirely too soon and pop another piece in, and causing us to empty our wallets for more and more gum. I won’t stand for this, get it together gum industry.