This blog post is late. It should have gone up a week ago. But before you get started with the chastising and the reprimanding, let me explain.
I have caught the Pinterest bug. It has crawled inside of my head and commandeered my hands and has caused me to do next to nothing but crochet for the past seven days. Sounds like a low-budget indie horror flick that not even the hippest of hipsters would be able to sit through. This website… is poison.
Not only have monumental amounts of homework accumulated in the past week, but I had two college interviews on Saturday, and I could have spent many hours trying to make myself more interesting, yet I thoughtlessly crocheted them away. And then the moment of truth came; the interviewer from Princeton asked me to detail my idea of the perfect afternoon, and I could do nothing but stammer, as all that filled my mind were visions of endless chain stitches and looping double crochets, dancing their mocking jig. Goodbye, Princeton.
While crafting useless things has taken up about 90% of my free time in the past week, the other 10% has been spent pursuing an equally impractical interest: Jon Hamm. I am even afraid to attempt to write about the glory that is this man due to the inevitability of inadequately conveying his perfection.
This non-relationship that Pinterest has enabled me to form with Jon Hamm has begun to affect my actual relationship with my real life boyfriend. The goofy smile I used to enjoy no longer stands up against the arrogant smirk of Don Draper… I have never been fond of cigarette smokers, yet now I find myself thirsting for the scent of Lucky Strikes.
In all seriousness though, this blog was founded on the belief that there are infinite possibilities with which you can fill your free time, and the intention was to encourage abandoning mindless internet surfing for more productive pursuits. Yet I myself have fallen victim to the oh so enticing, boundless world that is the world wide web. I am an addict, and I have relapsed.
Not for long, my dear readers. I have since deserted my Pinterest account, for the most part. I woefully deleted my Jon Hamm board, and I have carefully sorted through my collected crochet patterns and kept only the ones I can realistically complete.
It was a struggle. It still is. Every day that I don’t use–Pinterest, that is–is a small victory. There is no known cure for addiction, and it’s going to be a hard road to recovery. I have seen enough motivational quotes pasted onto the backdrop of a serene ocean, or a quiet landscape, to know that everything will be okay in the end.
Offer me some words of encouragement at [email protected], or tweet me @sweeeeeens. Thanks for allowing me to share my journey with you.
