The best cure for a struggling heart

Life has always been rough on me; a serious depression lingers under the makeshift mask I make for myself, thoughts of shame and humiliation feed the self-doubt that I can’t seem to shake. Nonchalant, and even happy, looks people give me in the hallway spark the thought in my head that they assume that I am worthless and not needed, just to realize later that those thoughts were a reflection of how I feel about myself.

By this point in my life, I’m pretty much used to these feelings and thoughts, although the pain isn’t any easier to handle. But recently, I have had, I guess you can say, a glimpse of who I really am. My life finally seems to be turning around for the better.

I can’t quite give a full and direct answer to why I’m gaining the feeling that I am worth something. I can, however name a big part of this change: my boyfriend Zachary Harrellson. He has always been an amazing friend to me, even though we met in second grade because I punched him in the back out of anger.

Everything we’ve been through since then has made a huge impact on who I am today. Even after expressing all of these thoughts I have about myself, Zach treats me like I’m important and shows me that I do matter. It’s not easy hanging out with someone who constantly complains that they’re not good enough for anything, but somehow Zach pulls it off. It’s amazing how much happier someone can make a person feel just by being there for them.

I can never thank Zach enough for everything he has done for me. He’s an amazing friend, boyfriend, and just a good person in general. Seeing how much he cares about me is what helps me see myself as someone that deserves more than I originally thought.

In a way, Zach saved me; he saved me from the negative thoughts that cloud my mind, even if the thoughts still come back occasionally. Sometimes all you need is a single person to completely turn the way you think about life around and the friendship you gain from that can cure unimaginable things.

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