February has a reputation.
It’s the shortest month on the calendar, yet it routinely feels longer than January. The holidays are over, winter is getting old fast, and spring remains just out of reach—another six weeks, if that overgrown rat’s prediction is anything to go by. All that there is is the harshest segment of winter, which makes me wonder if Elsa is real. Only one thing stands out, a glittering pink beacon to melt everyone’s frozen hearts: Valentine’s Day.
Unless you’re single.
For the past fortnight, I find myself bombarded with a visual cacophony of aggressively pink store aisles and overpriced teddy bears, marketing for the “Season of Love.” The air becomes filled with not some beautiful romance, but a stigma to be in a relationship, and anyone without a Valentine is expected to feel some kind of way about it. But among many students at FHC, being single is less than a crisis and more of a choice.
For Reed Veihman, a junior who says he’s been single “forever,” the appeal is mostly financial.
“It’s a financial project; you have to spend money, plan things, put a lot of effort in,” he said, all things he’s not interested in right now. The tradeoff, he explains, doesn’t feel that steep.
“You still get that relationship aspect from friends and stuff,” Veihman says.
This mindset appears in many other students, describing being single as less of a lack and more of a docket of priorities. Senior Liya Fikru explains how she sets her priorities while not being in a relationship.
“I value my time to myself…I don’t have to deal with the mental load,” she said.
Valentine’s Day doesn’t disappear for these individuals; it’s repurposed to suit their interests.
“ My parents are very nice, and they buy me sweet treats,” Veihman said.
Both mentioned celebrating with friends, usually getting food together.
“I don’t care for Valentine’s Day, [but] I do Galentines with my friends, [and] that’s good,” Sydney Spraggins said.
Spraggins, a junior, explains that being single gives her freedom.
“I’m not tied down…[relationships] can be controlling,” she said.
None of the students dismissed relationships entirely. Even those who’ve never been in one acknowledged potential upsides.
“You have a person that you can trust,” Spraggins said.
Fikru elaborated, explaining how the companionship can be appealing for some.
“Learning to develop with another person [is] a positive experience,” she said.
However, several students pointed out the negativity that can come attached with a partner. Relationships can be controlling, toxic, or just mistimed. While there are societal ideals around having your “soulmate” or “forever partner,” some couples simply aren’t meant to be. Veihman explains his stance on cutting loose from a relationship.
“I want everyone to break up…the drama would be funny,” he said, “I think everyone should try [being single] at least once…there are plenty of people who should not be in relationships, and they are.”
How does one navigate the treacherous topography of February while single? Conserve your resources and rely on your friends as a dependable support. Valentine’s Day, like every holiday, can be repurposed, ignored, or shared with friends.
Every February, stores become a festival of high fructose corn syrup and overpriced trinkets, each display judging everyone unattached. But while there’s a culture around being taken, being single has no penalties, and you won’t have to relate to the “I hate my boyfriend” trend.
